Sunday, July 24, 2011

Murphy’s love laws Part 2

It is better to be looked over than overlooked.

Never say no.

A man can be happy with any woman as long as he doesn’t love her.

Folks playing leapfrog must complete all jumps.

Beauty is skin deep; ugly goes right to the bone.

Never stand between a fire hydrant and a dog.

A man is only a man, but a good bicycle is a ride.

Love comes in spurts.

The world does not revolve on an axis.

Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation; the other eight are unimportant.

Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.

Don’t do it if you can’t keep it up.

There is no difference between a wise man and a fool when they fall in love.

Never go to beds mad, stay up and fight.

Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.

“This won’t hurt, I promise.”

Nothing improves with age.

An ex-wife/husband will always be “till death do us part”.

When a man wants his wife to hear, she doesn’t listen.

When that same man doesn’t want his wife to hear, she’s all ears.

It’s always easier to get a partner if you already have one.

Although it may seem like that on the outside, no one is having fun being single
If you’re heart is broken, sweep up the pieces.

There will always be someone who will want to put it back together.

Love and high-school must NEVER go together.

If a man speaks deep in the forest and there is no woman there to hear him; is he still wrong?

Show me a husband who won’t, I’ll show you a neighbor who will

It doesn’t matter HOW good it was, if you end up worrying or regretting it, it was bad sex

You get the best sex from the worst one for you

Never trust a woman who acts like you are so sexy she can’t help herself but drag you to bed

No one is as fascinating as they think

If you believe a relationship can’t work, but feel the need to try, it won’t.
Corollary: You will later find out that your lack of belief caused it to fail.

The duration of a relationship to a person is inversely proportionate to the importance of person to you.

The Key to a woman’s heart is an unexpected gift at an unexpected time.

The two thing no man can ever understand; Women and what makes all men complete damm fools over women.

Love makes believers of us all.

Translation: Love obscures common sense.

Being taken attracts women. Being single makes them avoid you like the plague.

If you go behind a girl you are heading to trouble.

In the eternal battle of the sexes, women are already the winners.

When with your girlfriend you will always have gas.

Celibacy is not heredity.

The hornier someone is, the less likely that it will be they have sex.

Corollary Horniness is inversely related to one’s chance of scoring

The man shalt not win the argument he started

The man shalt not win the argument he didn’t start

If a man won an argument, it was just in his head

(for the ladies) Try and try as you might, there will still be times where men are just assholes. We can’t help it and we’re sorry

A love will tell you they love you endlessly. A true love will tell everyone else they love you endlessly despite the embarrassment factor

When all else fails, have hope

Eichel’s Rule – During sex, try to sweat

In Romance; and in Finance we play with Figures.

A cauliflower resembles a rose, if your eyesight is not 6/6

Before falling in love do take your backup, it always helps in recovery.

if a man has it he won’t want it,

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